God can make good come from evil, but that does not justify evil.

Chris150,

But what about the ones who can't handle it and kill theirselves, they never reach adulthood! I hope you can live with yourself after they kill theirselves when you think it is good for them to be bullied.

Chris you are a sick, sick person. I was never bullied (and never bullied anyone) and I am a very strong person. I pray to God that you never have kids...cause they'll come home to you and ask for your help with bullying and you'll just tell them to suck it up and deal with it. You are a person with no heart or soul.

Don't go to the reunion lady..they jut want to clear their souls for the wrong doing they did to you..they knew then and now it was wrong.

ANDI-2091684 @ #1.3

He can live with himself because he does not care and evidently does not possess not an ounce of empathy for someone else.

I've had my experiences with bullying and survived. Believe me, it was not pleasant but eventually tormenters get bored and move on.

Not today though. In these times, bullys seem to be relentless which is why more children and young teens are killing themselves. As you know, with the internet, bullying can be a 24 - 7 activity.

It is shameful that the parents of bullys don't actively try to halt it and the schools are failing in this regard.

I think that is why these adults in the story are so ashamed now, because they know more, have lived more and have seen through this woman's post, the damage they did.

If it was good then it should be good now too. Chris150 you are a phucking azzhole.

Obviously you were a bully, probably still are today. Such a small, shallow person you must be.

Reminds me of a guy who bullied me through junior high and high school. I went off to college he stayed in hometown. I started running, lifting weights, doing pullups, pushups, you name it. I went back and met him at a party. He started his bullying bullchit. I grabbed him, wrapped him into a ball, picked him up, then dropped him to the floor and landing on him. Then I squeezed him till he started to squeek. I whispered in his ear, "I could kill you right now if I wanted to." Then I let him go. People who saw it came up to me and said, that needed to happen to him years ago.

While I wouldn't classify myself as a bully, (at least in violent terms) I do believe my friends and I created a culture in school where, if you weren't "part of our group", you were considered an outsider ... or not cool ... or whatever other childish thing you can think of. I'm sure there are fellow students out there that would have considered our group "bullies".

I can tell you, it's something I've wrestled with quite a bit over the last few years. I'm in my early 30's and have lived a pretty good life. I'm married, successful, and happy. But when people ask me If I have any regrets, I instantly know where my conscious takes me. The only regret I have is the way I treated the peers of my youth, and I wish I could take it all back.

The only solace I have is knowing that I didn't have a father-figure growing up to tell me how foolish and inhuman I was being. While I know that isn't an excuse, I do know that if I ever have children of my own I will be able to at least correct this mistake for them and their future.

People do change, I wouldn't even be able to recognize myself back then. But as I said, there is no excuse for degrading people.

Just check and make sure there's nothing over your head at the podium. Just saying. Other than that have a nice time at your reunion.

Chirs150 - So is it good when parents abuse children, because then the kids grow up to be stronger adults? Should we all beat our kids so they grow up ready to handle disappointment? Is it good when people get cancer because then they learn to value their lives?

Your argument is total bollocks.

Some people do become stronger from having been bullied, but that doesn't mean it's necessary or acceptable. Many more people develop a lifelong hatred and distrust of others from severe bullying. There are all sorts of life experiences that teach you to stand up for yourself. Maybe you don't understand what bullying is. Maybe you are confusing it with occasional teasing or the usual relationship changes that teens go through. Bullying is not just having somebody say they don't like your shirt or your hair. Bullying is serious harassment.

I have to agree with Chris, because we went to school together, and I've seen it first hand. All those years of beating him up really toughened up his face, and I know no man that has learned to take rejection from girls better than him. I think you turned out alright bro.

Chris, I completely agree with you. I'm just finishing college this year and had it not been for bullying that was done to me throughout grade school and high school, I would not have gotten this far. It taught me to toughen up my outer shell, to be able to take hard criticism, to be able push ahead in life so I would not be stuck under them all. I see people who bullied me years ago come up to me in college and try to act nice and stuff like that. I say thanks and all but really just ignore them. Karma hit them all rather hard. I can't name one of them who is passing everything in college. They all lost their scholarships and had to transfer from bigger schools to smaller community colleges.

All in all, had I not been bullied I would not be as strong as I am today. Sometimes it goes to far, I admit that. And believe me, I hated every minute of it, but now I know that I grew up better than them. So cudos to you Chris. You're not the only one who thinks this.

Chris150 has the intellectual maturity of a 13 year old . . .

Yes, but what good is the college degree if you do not know how to help others? Yes, I do believe that you should have gone to college. At some point it may change you. (But, ?)

Exactly!

Bullying is good for kids?

No. Play is good for kids. Competition (both physical and mental) is good for kids. A little bickering can be good for kids. A little teasing can be okay. But outright bullying is no help.

There may be a few who are able to deal with it and toughen up, and understand that they can take control of their own lives. Most will be scarred in some manner, whether it's because they've been beaten down so much (emotionally and/or physically) that they feel worthless (whether or not they actually admit it), or they've adapted in a twisted way, becoming more likely to get into fights, to demand obedience, to abuse others, and to abuse others. Those who tough it out also are more prone to become generally abrasive people who refuse to budge for anything, right or wrong, simply because of how they learned to deal with it.

If you see benefits to bullying then you are blind to the rest of what transpires.

I wish i had been nicer to some kids when I was in High School. I was never a ring leader but if I was wiser I would have steppped in and mad ethe worst of it stop ( Now, I know I could have.)

Chirs150 said:

was good to see kids get picked on, they became stronger adults later on in life.

This is 100% false; people just say that @!$%# so they don't have to take responsibility for being a rotten human being.

What that does is leave emotional wounds on people. It makes them less able to deal with other people in a meaningful and effective way.

Unless by "Stronger adult", you mean developmentally stunted, serially insecure, emotionally unstable, prone to substance abuse and violent emotional outbursts or worse, caging up everything inside of themselves while leading a life of bitter resentment.

In fact, abuse has been shown to make permanent changes to the brain; a stunted hippocampus and overly active amygdala which leads a whole host of cognitive and emotional difficulties that will follow a person for the rest of their life. They may learn how to hide it in public, but after that, its always going to be there.

I think this woman should blow off her old classmates and not go to that reunion. Some of them may be sincere and want to make amends, but I guarantee you there will be others there just waiting to ruin it for her and embarrass her in front of the others. She is better off staying away from that bunch of 5hitheads.

As one who was 'bullied' for years in school until this little worm turned on the bulliers, tell those being bullied to start fights with kids who pick on them. Whether they win or lose, make the bullies pay. Do it right in the classroom. Teachers like to look the other way when this stuff occurs; don't let them have the chance to ignore it. If they try to suspend your kid, the victim, for disruption, violence or that sort of thing, have them call the cops right then and there. If they refuse to call the cops, you call them. If they try to make your kid the victim, call the newspapers. The ideal situation is if your kid stops the bullying by choosing not to be a victim. But don't abandon him; don't let him take the blame for anything. The school is failing him. Keep raising the ante.

Chris 150 -

I was horribly bullied in school, and if school shootings were 'the thing' at the time I would have copied that behavior and been a shooter. Would you like to have been my classmate back then - knowing that I lusted for your death? Does that make you think that I am "stronger", as you claim I should be, after being bullied? I can't think of any other kind of strength except killing the tormentors, after what I've been through. Maybe you need to re-think your position; either that or you just haven't been around when anyone that has been bullied was really getting it from the others - you obviously don't understand the situation. And yes - I STILL hate them ALL.

I hope that the people that are 'crying now' about what they did to this woman in this article are teaching their kids something about what they did in the past.

^ Troll alert. Yawn....

"Free Speech":

Can your lecture on hipocracy - I've been through what he is supporting and I've just as much 'free speech' right to tell him what I think after going through it. You should definitely change your moniker because it is HARDLY fitting for you to come on here and talk about people's responses as being 'hipocritical' as these boards are full of different points of view. Here's another one of mine: DO I HAVE A VOICE ALSO - OR DON'T I COUNT?

Then shut it.

FreeSpeeche:

Awesome response!!!

When I was first entering high school, all of the freshmen were bullied and picked on by the senior class. One example they ran down all the freshmen boys and shaved our heads. Some went willing, I didn't and I paid for not going willingly. To Chris150, I don't disagree with you one bit. One thing getting bullied taught me is to be tough and stand up for myself. It helps to teach you that in the real world people will always oppose you, just like some will oppose my comment here. But I will not take it to heart or get upset about it, that's life. People threaten and push when they don't get their way, so you have to learn to resist that.

But there are points were bullying is taken to far and can do serious damage to children and young adults. In some ways bullying can be good, in others when allowed to go to far it can be tramatizing!!! there is a line, its a thin and sometime gray line, but never the less it needs to be monitored. But every little infraction shouldn't be punished to the full extent. Kids need to be taught to stand back up and learn to be tougher.

Alex,

I can only hope some of your comments are a bit of hyperbole ... I must say, they are a little disturbing.

As my comment suggested, I've long been troubled by my actions as a younger man and I've been dealing with them in my own way, but for you to sit there and talk about shooting up a school as though it's an idea still floating around your head scares me a little bit.

Please don't take this the wrong way, but maybe you could find someone to speak with about some of these issues? NOTHING could or ever would justify the mass killings that we've seen permeate our culture as of late my friend. There is no excuse or reason to even suggest that.

The definition of bullying has "progressed" accordingly, adding more and more activities that kids do to the PC list. Name calling, teasing, etc. It's such bee ess. I got bullied in 5th grade, then beat the carp out of the same bully in grade 6... I didn't need a fre aking letter 25 years later. What a crock, and what a bunch of wusses this entitlement generation has become!

At some point in time, virtually everyone gets teased a little bit while in school. It becomes bullying when it is relentless and there is nothing positive coming from a person or said to a person, sometimes it even is physical attacks on a person.

Often the kids who have this happen to them do not tell their parents/teachers because they have been bullied for so long they have no self esteem and the being to believe they deserve to be bullied. Other times they see the attitude of "grow up, grow a pair, or deal with it... its just kids" and realize that short of committing assault themselves, the bullying will not stop. I would hazard to guess that 90% of situations involving teens and weapons, the weapon is involved out of fear of bullying or in order to bully someone.

To stand idly by while someone is relentlessly teased or bullied is nearly as bad as doing it yourself. The only thing worse is to laugh or giggle at the other person.

Its nice to see that some of the bullies have matured. Perhaps some of them became victims in college or at their jobs and suddenly realized what they did. While the late apology does not wipe out what they did all those years ago, it will allow this woman to move forward with her life, perhaps a little happier and with the knowledge that there are some people who are nice.

I'm only a year out of high school so the bullying I endured is still fresh in my mind. I was bullied because I rejected the drinking, smoking, and sex the "popular" crowd partook in and went to youth group and played sports instead while keeping my GPA at a 4.0. There's nothing like being called a bitch, Bible-thumper, virgin Mary, etc. every single day. My school never helped my situation either... the one time I decided to take a stand for myself my junior year I got turned in for "bullying." I blew up on a bus ride home from a one-act play contest and the girls in my class threw a hamburger at my head. I know now that I shouldn't have lost it, but I screamed at those girls at the top of my lungs and called them every foul name in the book.

Oh well, I like to compare the then and now. Then, they were supposedly "successful." That didn't stop the underdogs from claiming victory during Homecoming >:) I got Queen... and now I am the only student out of my graduating class (11) to attend a 4 year University. Everyone else got into trouble with the law, failed classes, etc. and now attend a community college. I guess karma really is a bitch :)

Since I moved a lot as a kid, I was the object of bullies, too. In 6th grade, on the heels of another move, I decided to fight back. I stood for myself and never regretted it or the beat-downs it brought. Then, in High School, I started standing up for the other girls that were bullied. Before you knew it, I was the hot chick, the tough b*tch to call if someone picked on you. Yet, before long, I found myself in a circle of students beating up on one guy. I stood there, I shouted like the other bullies, I cheered, when the young man went down. He was my neighbor. When he got out of the hospital from the broken nose and arm, I went to him an apologized. He handled himself so gracefully, that all the boys, respected him somehow after that night, but I, I felt my heart break for the evil I participated in. Luckily, the guy who became my good friend and teacher of spiritual ways, was much bigger than all of us. Even those of us who SHOULD have known and thought we did know better.

I'm not sure how many people understand what Bullying is... It's an assignation of your character. It can include "mobbing" where others join in on the Bullying, and /or are actually recruited. It's a systematic campaign of interpersonal destruction. It is mistreatment severe enough to compromise the "targets" health. It can lead to PSTD and as mentioned above, a lifetime of pain. I was bullied at my last job of fifteen years when I became ill. The sicker I got the worse the Bullying got. When it's a superior orchestrating the Bullying it usually results in termination and that's just what happened. I didn't even have all my test results back yet. Hence, my petition. I'm against all forms of Bullying from the school yard to the work environment. Bullying is NEVER Ok !!! Please help support my anti-bullying petition....

I NEED your help !!! Let's make a "change" for us, our children and grandchildren ! I'm trying to expose the reality of inhumane, and potentially life threatening treatment of PEOPLE ! PLEASE help me get the word out ! Millions of people are Bullied at work too and it's NOT ...ok... ANY-where, ANY-time, ANY-age or for ANY-reason ! Please ask friends and family to help as well. Chances are, our loved ones (or you) have either been Bullied or know someone who has ...PLEASE SIGN and pass this on. We need as many signatures as we can possibly get. # I will pass these signatures on to "The Healthy Workplace Bill" .... let's make history TOGETHER ! Beth Poore

Wow..I was really impressed w/ all the comments concerning standing up for the few people that thought bullying made a person tougher. I would not call myself a saint, because I picked on some kids in school..and looking back It was MACHO INSECURITY..to all the tough guys...really. I can understand overcoming obstacles, hardships. I understood alot more completing basic training and AIT..and jump school. BUT, ridiculing a person for the simple reason to be a rotten prick is uncalled for..and LAME.

It was good to see kids get picked on, they became stronger adults later on in life.

Who became stronger because they were bullied?

I know of people that took their lives because there was no escape from it. I know of people that took their frustration out on their kids because of it. I know people that snapped and took other peoples lives because of it.

But I can not say I know a single person that became stronger from it.

Being bullied is never OK. Being bullied makes people feel like they are at fault. Being bullied tears away at a persons self confidence. Being bullied makes people lose hope. Being bullied makes a person feel all alone.

Bullying is a cowardly act and is never the right thing to do.

For those that feel bullying makes people stronger, let me introduce you to a few people that will have you sucking your thumb inside of a week. If you want to be a bully, walk a mile in the shoes of someone that has been bullied.

Being on the outside looking in is always a distorted view.

Passing anti-bullying laws will not work. Kids do not understand laws. We need to change the attitude of the kids where they think bullying is "uncool."

We need to get churches/temples/mosques etc to reach the "cool" kids to set an example and to stand up for victims of bullies. If the captain of the football team or homecoming king stands up for someone being bullied, all the other kids will stop bullying.

I was bullied and I'm stronger because of it. I learned early not to care what others thought, and it got easier as I got older. People teach their kids how to jump into the victim role with both feet so much nowadays. It's a wonder there are any bullys left...

Don't believe me? Check out the standard lawsuit today.

My parents were way ahead of their time and always taught us to stand up for people weaker than ourselves. I stood up for kids being bullied many times in grade and high school and occasionally I paid a price for it myself. However, I have never once regretted doing so and the fact that I stood up for bullied classmates has given me a deep sense of pride and self confidence that in trying times I will do the right thing.

I teach my children the very same lesson and they too are benefiting from caring about others. Standing up for people in need is a gift not only to the victims but also to myself.

Kumar - not sure if religion is the answer buddy. It is in my belief that the probability that the "cool" kids, captain of "footballs" team are attending any kind of churches/temples/mosques is extremely low. Most likely it may be the victims looking for answers. Bullying has existed for centuries, its in our nature.

I agree with Tatonka. I was bullied myself. Left in the past and buried it. Music & Star Trek saved me lol...gave me hope allowed me to dream of the world I wanted. Your mind is your biggest weapon and can be your worst enemy.

Peace People!

"Tumbling through a thousand centuries You don't know where you'll land" - George Harrison / Dream Away

In truth, my high school was rather strict on the matter. I suspect that even though it was in a bedroom community, close by on the other side of the state line it was not the best neighborhood. I was told they had a problem with kids coming over and selling drugs, so we had a lot of security, more so then you would expect if you saw the place.

Those of you that picked on others and bullied those less advantaged than yourself, and you know who you are even if you're in denial:

Was it really worth it? Do you feel better for doing that? Do you think your victim forgot? No, they did not forget. They remember everything that you did. Every word, every event and every deep scar you left behind. I remember the punches in the back of my head in class, the spitting in my food and all the filthy name calling. One of you lost your sister to the Green River Killer. Why her over you I always wondered.

A small part of me is still hurt over that. If I saw you were on fire, that small part of me wouldn't urinate on you to save your life. But the bigger part would indeed help you, pull you you to safety, call 911 and when help arrived, I'd just walk off without a word. . . . and giving you the regard you deserve, . . ZERO.

Wanna stop bullying? Then punish all the bystanders. Because bullies do it mostly for recognition by onlooking idiots agreeing with them, but too chicken to take part.

Screw them, let 'em toss and turn for life. You don't owe them a thing.

Kumar...I understand children don't know about laws, however you have to start somewhere. If we do nothing then nothing will change. We need programs starting in preschool, teaching (as children)how to accept others differences, and have anti-Bullying classes. Teaching them what is and is NOT appropriate. Most kids learn Bullying at home. They feel powerless and to make themselves feel better(in some twisted way) they turn right around and do whats been done to them, Yes, even though they HATED it. The classes I'm speaking of would continue into the workplace as well. We have to become kinder and gentler to our Nations people, Starting NOW... I see they edited out my link for the petition. You have to go to "change" dot org

No Chris 150- bullying is never a good thing. Even if the bullied learn to deal with it, bullying is bad for the bully and bad for the bullied. Bullying leaves deep scars on the bullied and frequently leads them to make choices that may not be the best for them, just to escape the bullying. Those who bully don't learn to be compassionate, caring human beings and then don't teach their children about why bullying is wrong and never acceptable, leading to another generation of bully's.

I was bullied as a child- for things I had no control over. I was bullied because my family was large and there was never enough money to go around. I was bullied because I didn't wear stylish clothes like the other girls wore and I generally only had one pair of shoes I had to wear with everything. I was bullied because we didn't have TV like the kids in town and we didn't have a phone for the majority of my school years and I had to do work to have money to go to games and to buy school pictures. I didn't have the money to buy material and a pattern for my Home Ec project, so I had to use an old pattern my mom had and I used the material from bags of flour to make a cotton dress for my little niece- because the floor sacks weren't big enough to make a dress I could wear. I was not overweight, overly tall or very short, I was not considered ugly and had nothing glaringly wrong with me; but we were poor. And for that my school years were the most miserable one could imagine. I was smart, but I hated school because it was so painful to be there. I ended my torture by getting married very young- just so I could leave. I missed out on all the things most girls get to look forward to doing in high school. I didn't go to prom and I didn't go to homecoming dances. (All my dates were from other towns.) I wish I could have had those things but they weren't happening for me, so I was very happy to leave. The majority of children don't have the tools to deal with bullying so it does have very real effects on them.

This young woman is fortunate that she had the ability to reach out to some of her tormenters through her poem and I'm glad they realized what they had done to her. I hope she is able to go to her reunion and have a good time. I, too, have forgiven those who tormented me, for my sake. I don't want to live with anger or hatred in me and I'm sure she has found the same. But I raised my children to not be bullies and to stand up for kids who are being bullied because I would have never wanted my children to be those who were remembered for the torture they inflicted on others. I always told them to put themselves in the other person’s shoes before they did or said anything intended to wound.

Chirs150 is an idiot. I hope he/she doesn't have kids because they will grow up to be idiots as well.

What? Are you gonna cry now? C'mon cry baby, cry for me-- c'mon! Cry! Haha!

Deep in the recesses of my brain a tiny red hot little flame began to grow...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvijyBIgazE

In Native communities, teasing but not bullying is the norm. The people you know love you, tease you to strengthen you against the realities of the world. Done with humor and a deep affection, it is fun but also raises moments of embarrassment and shame, calls one to test ones inner strength and creativity in small doses. So, one learns how to live uprightly and how to handle the storms of life. In Euro communities, violence is the norm, the bullying comes from fear and hatred. Seems a clear choice to me, but what am I but some little abused and abandoned woman......

Chris150 has been jumping around to different message boards making ridiculous comments just to get a rise out of people. Just ignore him.

Yes, in the long run being bullied did make me a stronger person, but it took a long time for me to get there. I love myself and my life now, but I sometimes wonder what I could have done with those years that I spent getting my self-confidence and trust in people back.

Thanks, always wanted to hear what a unrepentant bullies point of view was...

Times have and do change. My bullys cut my grass and tend to my pool. I tell them they missed a spot frequently and I don't care if it is raining. It's life's circle in sweet action............

chirs150

Karma has some bad plans waiting for you.... very, very bad!

Chirs150, I will fully agree with that as soon as we make it legal for the weaker kids to shoot their bullies to death. Let's see if the bullies' can stand up to that, and if THAT will make them tougher.

Bullying makes your life hell. There is no excuse for it.

Being tormented, tortured, and belittled does not build character or strength. It tears you down, makes you feel worthless, and consumed by fear. How does that create a healthy adult who can function in society? You know what does help? Teaching children to respect others and show compassion rather than following the crowd and picking on the weak and those that are different. No one should have to feel that way nor should those actions be tolerated as some sort of "phase" or "right of passage".

Go away Troll.

@ Chirs150: 0/10. You fail.

What you are saying is pure BS. There are far better ways to prepare children for this "crule" world than sadistic and masochistic means. (I'd give you extra negative points for your blatant misspelling of "cruel", but it is obvious the only thing you learned in school is Bullying 101 and not English).

If you were a bully: Life will give you one Hell of a pimp slap later on in life.

...either that or you are trolling. In that case: You fail at that as well.

Either case: I invoke article #14 of the Rules of the Internet on you. Your message was reported as well for inflammatory remarks.

Chris150

spoken from a person who has obviously never been bullied. Your comment is total BS! It is not a right of passage. Have you not read stories about bullied kids who have committed suicide or shoot their classmates? The is never a reason for anyone, kid or adult, to bully or belittle anyone. I certainly hope you do not have kids, because I hate to see what you would teach them.

#2.0, I hope you make your time on the planet worth while and get into the military in the Middle East. We need people like you to show them.

Perhaps if we taught all our children bullying is wrong then the world wouldn't be so tough or cruel. saying that's it's a 'rite of passage' just perpetuates the problem and holds back the entire species.

ORLY?

Brutal, unending verbal and physical abusive from a mob is a rite of passage? Okay. If you say so. Thanks for illustrating the bully's point of view. I wonder whether it made you feel powerful and impressive when deep down you know you were such a total, worthless loser.

As is said before me; Kharma takes too long; I'd like to beat the stupid out of you now!!!!!

So then everyone in our military past and present has been bullied. It is the role of Bootcamp to break you down to the core human and build you back up as a team. I frequently refer back to what my grandfather used to say to all of us all the time. " Wars hell, life is hell! Grow up and deal with it, or complain about it. People who deal with it prosper in life those who dont blame others." Im 60, it has served me well to remember when I want to complain about something.

jollyoldsoul1, what a STUPID comparison. I went through boot camp, and was bullied as a kid. They were nothing alike. One, you realize is for a purpose, and the other, is just for cruelty. One defined my life, the other I still despise with all my being.

Ding ding ding. We have a winner. Dumbest post of the day. Congrats Chris you f'ing tool.

If it was good then it should be good now too, Chris150 you are a phucking azzhole!

I agree with Chris. I was bullied, I survived, I'm better because of it. The bullies lives have sucked for years and I can't wait for the highschool reunions when I can go see how much worse they've gotten. Carry on Chris, carry on.

In my experience I've found that the bullied dont get stronger for being bullied. They are ususally hurt. Im sure some victims will say otherwise to cover any shame and damaged self-worth that comes with victimization.

I've also found that bullies are cowards and fools. PA Resident and Chris150 are surely no exception.

I also tend to agree with Chris150. EVERYONE gets bullied and for someone to claim they were not, then they’ve blocked it out. There is ALWAYS someone bigger and badder on the playground to contend with. It might not have been as relentless as what I went through, but everyone has been made to feel inferior by a fellow student. That’s life. Deal with it.

It IS fun to return to class reunions over the past 30 years to see how well these azzhats faired. Not many became successful. Those of us in the “bullied” crowd are FAR more prosperous and we take great pleasure that we survived those dark years in spite of what we went through physically and even more so – mentally. I am more compassionate because of what I went through.

I do, however, agree that bullying has gotten out of hand in recent years with the Internet. I used to have a safe refuge when I made it home at the end of the day. Nowadays, the bullying goes on … online 24/7/365.

Wow Fuque Hugh... You went and proved everybody wrong:

You are the Fail Troll of the day.

In addition to winning no points for your "intelligent" post and being reported, you win this:

Fail Troll Award Statue

I now invoke Article #14 of the Rules of the Internet on you. I encourage others to do the same.

FUQUE --- you are right, "faggots" only come into this world by way of heterosexual people so breed on my man, breed on.

And now half our country wants to elect a high-school bully. That's f'ed up!

Chirs150,

I'm a former Navy SEAL and would be happy to give you some "interesting character building" exercises. Bring whom and whatever you like and I'll use my bare hands. . . . Come to Seattle and we'll see how that works out for ya... :-)

Fuque Hugh,

This "carbon based bi-pedal life form" got himself banned.

'Crule' - you turned out to be a showpiece.

@lk in la to chris:

 I hope you make your time on the planet worth while and get into the military in the Middle East. We need people like you to go away and get killed.

Fixed that for you.

Chirs150:

Columbine kind of makes your argument irrelevant now, doesn't it? Whether your opinion is right or not, do you really want to risk your kids taking one in the squash just because they are "alpha" types that bully others? Genie's out of the bottle now, dude. As far as the kids that are being bullied are concerned, this is now a viable option. If they are at the point of killing themselves, what difference does it make to them if they take a few bullies along for the ride?

It doesn't matter if you perceive these people as weak. There is nothing on earth more dangerous than a human being who doesn't think they have anything left to lose.

I see what you did there.

+1 for Mr Yuk. I haven't seen him in a lifetime! Sorry, carry on...

"they weren't my friends then....why should i pretend they are my friends now?"

BINGO. And I went through the same school district the whole time, from k-12, so every year I got to be bullied by the same jerkwads all over again. I was stuck with them for that long, I do not want or need to be anywhere near them for one. second. longer.

so, again, it's all about THEM. how can THEY feel better.

Makes me wonder what the bullies went through in their lives later on to have this turn-around moment.

Some years ago, I had a boss who had been bullied through school. The duckling grew into a swan and had made something of her life. She went back to her high school reunion feeling confident and those who had bullied her continued to hold this accomplished woman in contempt at the reunion. Grown women, supposedly. This was way before the net had reached the popularity it enjoys now.

If there was no internet or FB, would the bullies have gone out of their way for Ms. Frederick??? It really makes me wonder...

OOh I bet they would have....for fear of what the neighbors thought. Those kinda people like to keep up with the Joneses and have a little white picket fence......and....hide all their dirty @!$%# in the closet!

Guilt is a human reaction that CAN, if allowed, cause one to think differently and act differently....PERHAPS all you ding-dongs who don't know better, could consider that now that they are grown, they are willing to take responsibility for their actions and live differently in the world.

To: JIMradio "sounds like they just don't like feeling guilty....so, again, it's all about THEM. how can THEY feel better." YOU don't know they're minds, but YOUR small mind causes you to think you know everything about them. Why not just accept at face value, as the victim in this case did, their heartfelt apology and move on. Did you ever think the world would be a better place if we all tried this??

oops

Alot of money ends up getting invested in only a few kids. Athletics should be part of all school curriculums. But athletics has overwhelmed American education, and is one reason why the education system is not doing what it should.

@Charles. I had to stay with the same people from K-12 too and they were horrible. And I knew that most of them would be going to the university not far from our town. So, even though my parents wanted me to go there, I knew I would not be attending that school. I'm so glad I moved away. And I will never go to my reunion either.

To Chris150 :

You are an idiot! There! That should make you feel bad enough to improve your character and make you strong! Obviously you are no longer a child, but still think like one!

Ditto, agree completely. Bullying takes various forms and it's not something that is ever completely forgotten by those of us on the receiving end but it seems that those who bully never seem to have a memory of it or perhaps it is too inconsequential for them to give a second thought too.

Christine and Linda, pay no attention to chirs150. He posts like this consistently on every article. It's not a matter of opinion or debating an issue which he truly believes. He enjoys going against the flow no matter what the subject. I think the definition might be troll.

Sometimes a troll may be more than a troll. Like a troll with a 'loose screw' in the 'noggin'.

Like a troll with a 'loose screw' in the 'noggin'.

Yep. :)

Speaking of which, NewsVine has it's own share of bullies.

Totally agree with chefaz there he so correct... Newsvine lets bullies run rampant on here..No mediator or monitoring its a free for all.. Big people hiding behind thier screens being bullies and thier mean hearted self....

Being bullied is like being in hell. The people who suffer from it feel helpless. My best friend Mary Eve Thorson was one of them. Please look at www.marythorsondocfilm.com. Help by making a difference.

Yeah, Chris150 may be a troll, but as I sit here and read all of the comments speaking out against bullying, I see the same people bullying those who have a different viewpoint. If Chris150 is a troll as has been said many times, then why are you feeding him and his so called inflammatory statements? It seems to me that reacting in such a manner to one who is well known for wanting attention are simply doing exactly as he desires. That, in my honest opinion seems counter intuitive to your arguments. Feeding him simply enables the bullying behavior that you claim he has.

If he isn't a troll, then your negative and demeaning statements towards him are nothing more than the very same vile behavior that you yourselves are condeming here on this post. Either way, your actions are the very same as the actions you claim to abhor in others. That causes you all to come off as hypocrites who only want to be seen as champions of those who can't or won't defend themselves so that you can stand in your own glory. If you truly are the good, strong people you claim to be, then you would not descend to the same depths as those you claim are in the wrong.

I realize that being bullied causes a certain amount of resentment and hostility and that it would seem that those who did these things to you are not deserving of forgiveness. I will ask you one question, why do you think that the act of forgiveness is for the benefit of the one being forgiven? The act of forgiveness is for the one doing the forgiving. Let me explain, when you forgive those who have transgressed against you, you are freeing yourself from the poison of hatred and anger that they have implanted within you. You re freeing yourself from allowing those individuals who have hurt you to control your emotions and thoughts even though they aren't there. Forgiveness frees the one who was wronged, not the one who did the wrong. When you can forgive then you will truly be able to come against the behaviors that you condemn in a manner that is constructive instead of simply being a continuation on your part of the very same behaviors that bring such pain and sorrow to so many lives.

La TanyadTruth Hinton

I am truly sorry about your friend and would like to know more about what happened to her.

I don't fault people who take their own lives for the terrible pain that it causes their family and friends. I know that they must feel so desperate and alone that they're not thinking clearly. I do wish that even in the depths of despair that she much have found herself in that she could have done something that didn't have to involve someone else however. It just makes the whole tragedy that much worse.

Pointing out that a person's response lacks empathy and humanity is not "bullying" that person. It is just stating the facts.

Wants,

That's true. I wasn't talking about that. I was responding to the name calling and demeaning comments. It is possible to point out facts without resorting to name calling or making unfounded comments about their mental facilities and capabilities, as well as remarks about their maturity level made simply to attack them. I never once said he was correct in his statements. We can all agree that his views are off base. Do you honestly think that he will take our views and thoughts to heart if we keep attacking him? I know that he won't. No one takes bullies seriously, even if they are in the right. We don't listen to them because they are simply attacking us. My point here is that if we want to become better than what we, as a society, are now, then we need to stop acting in the same ways as those that we condemn. We need to be constructive in our criticisms and discussions. We all need to stop being holier-than-thou. We need civility. Then we can make a difference.

JIMradio,

RIGHT ON MAN! That is exactly how I feel. Reunions? Nothing but a popularity confirmation/refresh in my opinion. Those people were MEAN and there are a couple of them that if they were on fire, I would hesitate to urinate on them to save their lives.

It depend on how bad it was. There was a story about girl with a permanent leg injury after being bullied. Do you think she just forgot about it? Do you think anyone forgot about the bullied kids that have been involved in school shootings? My guess is No. You may have forgot or pushed it out of mind but some people don't have that luxury!

There is also that boy who recently won a lawsuit after being paralyzed by bullies in his school. He had informed the Principal on numerous occasions of the torment his fellow students where placing him through and yet the school did nothing. After one well placed punch from a bully the kid was paralyzed.

Bullying is a serious problem, those that sit there and make excuses for bullies and mock kids for not 'sucking it up' are part of the problem as well. When I was in high school I was bullied and I can guarantee it made things hell, though I was able to get passed it because of my friends I know there are some out there that feel alone. Schools and parents need to take a step up in stopping it and those that do bully need to be punished, there is no excuse.

fuque hugh- can we please stop with the nasty uncalled for insults..cuz honestly it doesnt make you cool. Its sad that we as adults have to sit behind keyboards and name call other people. some kids can handle the bulling and some cant that doesnt make them "faggots"..nor does it make them "pussys"..and to tell someone that thier kid should hang themselves cuz of thier father being a "faggot' is very,very uncalled for and its childish and stupid. I hope that one day karma bites you right in the ass..cuz ill have front row seats to that just so i can watch and see how life treats you afterwards.

kichka~ Obvious troll is obvious, by his name alone you can tell Hugh isn't long for the Vine. Don't fall for it and don't lower yourself to it. :D

He does not remember that episode of his life or closing hundreds of business's laying off thousands to line his pockets.......

... if Romney doesn't apologize, then he is not presidential.

He did say he was sorry "if" he hurt anybody, but claimed not to remember. Sincerity isn't Willard's strong suit. Sure, some bullies see the error of their ways--but for many it develops into a personality trait. Face it, some people like being azzoles to others - and are very accomplished!

he did apologize. he said if I ever hurt someone in high school, I apologize. He didn't say it directly to that student but it was an apology.

His other (5?) classmates, (who were either fellow participants or witnesses), independent of each other, vividly remembered and verified the episodes as detailed in the Post. But he "doesn't remember?" That's total BS and the denial is just as telling as the bullying. Combined with his repeated and documented insensitivity toward the poor, the working class, dogs, etc....he seems to have a demonstrable lack of any real empathy. And I'm sorry, Romney apologists: By the time you are a senior in high school, your character is pretty well formed. For that same reason, I also tend to doubt the sincerity of this woman's classmates. The bullies would be easily identifiable so you have to wonder if public embarrassment prompted their regrets rather than any actual remorse.

Mitt Romney's WEAK response tells you as much, or more about him than his physical assault and bullying of that gay kid while Mitt was a senior in high school.

His pretending to "not remember", while not denying what 5 witnesses saw, of a physical assault (not just teasing) that happened as a senior is just plain LYING and weasel behavior that "fits" with the constantly shifting and lying Mitt Romney the politician with no core principles or beliefs other than his "entitlement" to rule over you "little people".

Fuque: Wow...what a shock to learn of your political leanings. Gee. Who could possibly have guessed....

Get this DISTURBED Fuque High character out of here, Please!

That's Karma.... It's not worth it to tell them how bad they made you feel now, they are paying for it anyway... It comes back to get them. Many of the bullies in my school didn't grow up and move on... they grew worthless and moved in with their parents....Glad it turned out well for you!

That's pretty much my story too, queenie! Ridiculed for my parents' religious beliefs, like I had any say in that. I love how all these people try to friend me on facebook now just because I came from the same podunk town they still reside in. I live light years away from there and all the "popular" kids aka bullies, are pretty well screwed happiness wise. I wish I knew that is how it would end up when I was a kid. If I see a kid down on his or her luck, I make sure to tell them how things turn out in the end. Bullies are not capable of compassion, empathy or logical thinking. They are selfish dopes and I will tell you that they come from families that encourage bullying and superiority. Apples do not fall far from their trees....

Now, now, then they'll own you. Never hit.

curious: how do you manage to turn even this tale into a blind political rant ...amazing.......

That didn't strike me as a "blind political rant." Unnecessary to the subject, perhaps, and possibly blind (I don't know whether it's true or not; it would only count as blind if it was stated without any factual basis), but certainly not a rant. Merely a somewhat sarcastic statement.

it was stated without any factual basis and nothing to indicate sarcasm.

The sarcasm was in "illustrious."

Also, while it may, indeed, lack any factual basis, the lack to providing facts does not mean that the person did not find that information elsewhere.

*shrugs* Please pardon me, I'm an eternal devil's advocate.

I just hope it's not for show. It's not about them. They should not care at all about doing this to make themselves feel better. They should never be OK with what they did. I think people just get aggravated because they are making ammends to something that can't be changed. For people that have there lives ruined by bullying even if the bullies later repent it doesn't change the result of that person's life. It's not OK for people to bully now and just think they will make ammends when they are older. you don't get a do over. While I applaud there efforts for me it's a little too late. Instead they should be active, give speeches, go to schools, and let bullies know they will regret it. If they put themselves out there for all to see not caring what there friends and family think I might change my mind. Talk is cheap the action is what counts!

Lynda: Yours is an amazing tale of resiliance. I hope your experience will help your daughter find strength as well....and the knowledge that no one can make you feel badly about yourself without your permission.

I also perceive something disingenuous about that apology.

Lynda, very courageous of you to share something this personal as the actual subject of the article. Forgiveness is not always easy and I commend you. GOD Bless you and your family richly.

lynda no its not ok! They damaged your self esteem and tortured you on a daily basis according to your poem.. Forgiveness is not bliss. Religion has no part in this discussion ,but it always finds it way..The devil was there and you want to ensnared by him once again... good luck if you go it will be awful .I wouldnt but it up to you .. maybe you like this attention and uta ll negative attention and you are thriving on it.....

They dont care about you ~~Please wake up and remember why you left... Forgiveness is shallow at this point in time people and lynda they were never your friends hun. Spend the reunion time with friends that really care about you and not these psychologically damaged ex students of yours who had born and breed a new crop of bulliers..Its alive and well out there duh. So, wise up Lynda and dont go its a trap. They are not going to fawn all over you and throw money as a forgiveness tactic.... Be strong make a statement and DONT GO!

Hunter: do remember this is high school we're talking about. No excuse of course for being a jerk at any age, but most adults are able to recognize that a 17 year old is not a 40 year old. It's not yours to tell Lynda how to feel about it now, or whether she has permission to forgive.

Hunter 2010

Forgiveness is never shallow at any point. Just as it is never too late to forgive, it is never to soon to do so as well, as long the forgiveness is real in the heart of the one who is doing the forgiving. Being able to sincerely forgive those who have hurt you is a sign of inner strength that surpasses the strength of the ones who have acted against you.

That being said, I would also like to state that being forgiven frees no one from their actions. It does, however, free the one who was acted against. Remember too, that though you may forgive a person, it doesn't mean that you have to trust them or forget what they did. We all learn from the past and to forget what was done to you simply allows it to be done again.

Lynda

I applaud you for your integrity and for having the strength of character and will to be able to forgive them. I admire your courage to free yourself from the bonds of hatred that they have tried to chain you with. I admire you for your wisdom and ability to see those poisonous emotions. These are the qualities and values that have allowed you to move forward in your life and have a family that you love and loves you in return. Never give these things up, they are the things that make you the strong worthwhile person that you are.

Lynda,

I'm glad that you have been left with scars that are able to not be so deep that you can forgive. Good for you.

However, there are those of us that the bullying and indeed assaults and abuse was so bad, we can't do that so quickly, if ever. For some of us, the pain is so deep that we just left the scene as soon as we were able and put that past as far behind us as we can make it.

This is an important issue in this election cycle. Romney's "antics" (assaults) in his high school days resulted in a mans life being left miserable to his death. Yes Romney is typical in the memory denial of his part in it and this "theme" has continued throughout his life, indeed, he has been rewarded for his behavior.

..... and people will actually vote for this man.

nobullchallengedotorg

Hello. This site is very important. I hope your nephew does well. Please take a look at www.marythorsondocfilm.com. Mary Thorson, a teacher who was BULLIED BY EDUCATORS, is my best friend.

My sister ran into one of the bullies that used to pick on my through middle school and high school a few years ago. She seemed totally oblivious to the fact she used to torment me, and actually told my sister that they should hang out sometime, and have their kids get together.

Then my sister told me that her children were terrors, and didn't listen to a word she said... so that made me feel better, knowing she's having a tough time now. My sister told her no thanks, and left.

Why be surprised that the 'former' bullies show no remorse? Many of them are sociopathic or narcisstic. These types know how to copy the correct compassionate response if needed, such as if they get caught, but they never really change.

Whether it made you more insecure, or stronger, the real problem is that it wasted days and days, and years and years of your education. I am for life-long education for those who love learning. But it can be almost useless to try to catch up on the basics.

Yea... because that always works (rolls eyes).

Jonathan: are you a dad? You don't sound like you are, or you'd know that is exactly what works. Parents have far more impact than you apparently realize, especially when they model that behavior right in front of their kids. (Yes, even when the eyes are rolling....they are capable of hearing you.) One thing you can be absolutely sure of. The failure to teach how to treat others is not an alternative most of us want to live with.

ninster-3058383, I agree with you to the extent that you do have one-half of the story. But let us all remember that this contemporary scene is not the best way for all.

I know how you feel, Kitten. I was treated the same way in middle school and high school, and my tormentors never got into trouble. But know that it does get much better after high school. Some people say that high school is the best years of your life... for me, they were the worst. After high school, I went to college, which was much better, and those years after high school are the best.

So don't lose heart. It gets a lot better after high school.

KittenKay, they're not worth it and they wouldn't understand or care if you hurt yourself. Hang in there and live your life to the best of your ability. MagnoliaSimms speaks the truth. It all changes after high school. You'll never know how much it will change until you're through with it and move on.

Kitten: no, it won't leave you, but don't underestimate the moving on part. You know what they say? "Living well is the best revenge." You have no idea yet how true that is, but square those shoulders and you will find out. Hold your head high, be yourself, understand just how strong you are. You are going to leave them so far behind, they'll be tasting your dust for the rest of their lives...Go get 'em girl...

Actually, 'bullying' is rather common among adults, even older adults in our current society. But only fools do not know that it can quickly become labeled battery and assault, if the police do care to get involved. (Hint.)

Good for you Lisa. I was pretty well bullied all through School, even in to college. Routine stuff: ostracizing, beaten up, personal items taken or destroyed, lockers urinated on, the name-calling, all the fun stuff. It wasn't until recently when I have started to finally adjust out.

I won't go back for a High School reunion. To me, those people are dead. They had 15 years to make me hate myself, I won't give them another day. Even if I saw them bleeding out in the street, and I was the only one in miles to able to call for help.

If you survive the torment, the best way to deal with the agony and self-hatred is to leave those worthless idiots behind. They aren't even worth the word "human".

Unfortunately, bullies are often bullies for life. I am now trying to deal with one at my mom's memory care unit. The administration thinks we should overlook his behavior because of his dementia, but everyone there has dementia and he is the only one who is mean and aggressive. He sucks up staff time as they are trying to control him, which is necessary, but then other folks get less staff attention for THEIR needs.

Well said Jax A...................you hit the nail on the head.

You make an excuse for bullying by saying that it's "human nature"? No it's not human nature. Human nature is something born into EVERYBODY. Mob mentality is what you are talking about and what is the common denominator when it comes to people with mob mentality? They are all weak minded and can't think for themselves.

No, this has not always been the case, and it is not always the case now. Do not lie.

What is the principal (& in some cases the asst) doing all day? Get out of the office & monitor whats going on in that building! Teachers should have the right to toss ANY trouble makers out of class. The nuns were scary but they had control.

I was Bullied by a group of 6 , because I was small and weak with no friends, now I am 6 ft 6. and very strong, I would like to meet all 6 of them together, not to hear them say sorry but get my own back 4 boys and 2 girls, I am going to rip their faces off. just watch your backs..............