Tribute to Sgt. Robert Weinger, Staff Sgt. Timothy Bowles, Sgt. Christopher Abeyta and Spc. Norman Cain III.
As a boy, Bob Weinger played soccer and was on the school wrestling team in his hometown of Round Lake, Ill., north of Chicago. He rode motorcycles and drag raced his car as a teenager -- a “crazy kid,” said his mother, Susan Weinger.
“He always wanted to be a GI Joe,” she said.

Courtesy Susan Weinger
Sgt. Bob Weinger
In 2006, Bob joined the Illinois National Guard, went to boot camp and then straight to Iraq. There, he guarded prisoners. His mother later learned that one of them was former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein.
Bob came home, but after trouble finding a job, signed up for another tour of duty, knowing he was heading to Afghanistan.
On March 15, 2009, Sgt. Robert Weinger was killed when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle in the village of Kot, in eastern Afghanistan. He was 24.
Susan Weinger is one of thousands of mothers of fallen soldiers who each year take part in annual Memorial Day services across the country. For many Americans, the holiday marks the traditional start of summer. But for loved ones of the fallen, it's a somber day to honor the dead.
Like Weinger, many mothers of fallen soldiers belong to a group called the American Gold Star Mothers, named for the traditional gold star put in windows of homes signifying a family of a fallen soldier.
Killed in the same attack as Bob Weinger were Staff Sgt. Timothy Bowles, Sgt. Christopher Abeyta and Spc. Norman Cain III. Cain’s sister, Bree Otto, has posted a video on YouTube titled 'Never Forget' to remember the fallen Illinois guardsmen.
A short time after Bob’s death, a soldier in uniform knocked on Susan Weinger’s door. “I knew if they came to the door he was dead,” she said. “If he was just hurt it would be a phone call.”

Courtesy Susan Weinger
From left: Bob's fiancee, Tanya Colatorti; Bob; Bob's younger brother Paul Weinger; his aunt Vicki King; and Bob's mom, Sue Weinger.
The man asked if she was Sgt. Robert Weinger’s mother. “I just kept asking, ‘is he dead, is he dead,’ and the man kept repeating ‘Are you Sgt. Bob Weinger’s mother?’ and he wouldn’t answer. Finally, he just bowed his head, and said, ‘he’s dead.’”
“I was numb for almost a year,” Susan Weinger, a middle school librarian, said. “I finally went back to work just because I wasn’t any good at home anymore.”
She became involved in the American Gold Star Mothers -- she’s now the president of the Northern Illinois chapter -- because she said she knew her son wouldn’t want her to grieve forever.
Betsy Schultz, of Port Angeles, Wash. started a foundation to honor her son, Capt. Joseph Schultz, 36, who was killed in action in Wardak Province, Afghanistan, on May 29, 2011.
The Captain Joseph House Foundation is meant as a living memorial, with the organization funding a retreat for service members and their families at a former bed and breakfast on the scenic Olympic Peninsula.
Schultz is bracing for the year anniversary of her son's death.

Courtesy Betsy Schultz
Capt. Joseph W. Schultz
“The last four to five days for me is just getting to the 29th, Betsy Schultz said. “And it’s really hard. I feel like I’m putting the breaks on. I don’t want May 29 to come. It just brings it all back very fresh.”
For many mothers, as time passes by, public service helps them through the sorrow.
“We’re not a grief organization,” national American Gold Star Mothers president Norma Luther told msnbc.com. “We are here to support each other. We do that by banding together and working for veterans in the hospitals and nursing homes and just stepping in wherever we see that they have a need. By doing that we begin to heal.”
“At the bottom of our list are barbecues and picnics and the like,” Luther said. “We hope everyone can try to remember what this day is for.”
Luther lost her son Glen. P. Adams Jr., a 27-year-old West Point graduate, to a helicopter accident in Germany in 1988. She said her emphasis has been to bring home the message that all mothers who have lost a son or daughter while serving in the military are gold star mothers, not just moms who have lost their children from combat deaths.
“Those deaths deserve as much recognition, respect and honor as someone who was killed in a war zone,” Luther said.
This weekend, services to honor veterans are planned in nearly every city and town in the country.
Luther will be at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial on Monday when, on the 50th anniversary of the war, President Obama and other officials will pay homage to those who served there.
Susan Weinger will be in Chicago on Sunday for a Memorial Day parade, and on Monday will be at the cemetery to honor her son by planting a tree.
Betsy Schultz will spend Friday at Fort Bragg, N.C., for memorial services for Joseph, who was an Army Ranger in special forces. On Saturday, she will go to Arlington National Cemetery, where her son is buried. On Monday she will attend a breakfast at the White House for gold star families.
"It’s an honor to have them honor Joseph in this way," Betsy Schultz said. "He believed and he gave everything. I supported his decision to do what he does. He was proud to be an American and be there for his country. How could I not feel proud."
On Sunday night, a national Memorial Day concert called “A Night of Remembrance” will take place on the Capitol Mall in Washington, D.C., to pay tribute to Americans who have served and their loved ones. It will be broadcast live at 8 p.m. ET on many PBS stations.
NPR is also hosting a Virtual Wall of Remembrance, where people can post memories of their loved ones who died in war.
More content from msnbc.com and NBC News:
- Police find mom of three children abandoned in Oregon
- Second Mile, charity that Jerry Sandusky founded, seeks to shut down
- Tsunami Harley-Davidson's next stop: US museum
- Recording may reveal new evidence in Manson murders
- Video: Former prep football star cleared of rape conviction
Follow US News on msnbc.com on Twitter and Facebook


@ Johnessy, Sir with all the "thank you man" stuff we see here you are the only one that comes close to understanding. I don't see anything that looks like an apology for the wrong decisions to send KIDS off to these unwarranted wars. Afganistan...yeah right after 2000 years of this war we are going to fix it?? and now 10 years later we are going broke as did the Russians and many before them. If people want to have credence for their "thank you" then they have to question "why do we need to go" and B) send their own kid! How can people be so opposed to women having an abortion but no second thought about then sending that 18 year old abortion survivor off to war to be killed. There is a problem with this picture. When can the most powerful country in the world ever come to the conclusion that you can not win an insurgent war with bigger guns??? I am grieving the KIDs I lost beside me in Viet Nam (for no reason other than money) and struggle watching our disconnected society who have no understanding of how those relatives and families will never have the happiness they deserved but lost it to poor political decisions. Bring back the draft, require politicians to sign up or sign their kid up before voting to go to any war.
While I have much respect for our troops, it saddens me that EVERY soilder that ever put his life on the line did it in vain. They fight and die to protect our freedom from foriegn aggressers while the ingreats at home left this nation turn into the socialist pisspot it is quickly turning into. Read the book "The Naked Communist" written in 1958 and pay close attention to the 45 steps to turning America into a communist country. If you at all an honest person, atleast with yourself, you'll know right away that we are in BIG trouble.
if you are honest with yourself in any way you would realize that "communism" was used as a scare tactic by leadership in the US to get Americans to support military efforts around the world for the sole purpose of the United States beating out the USSR as the world's super power. There is nothing inherently evil about the concept of communism and the only reason it has been a disaster in other countries is because it was being implemented by corrupt governments, usually authoritarian, totalitarian or else dictatorships.
I am not necessarily and advocate for communism but people were being fed such BS about it and being scared witless that there are now tons of conspiracy theorists born from that era of the "red scare" and think there is some huge secret movement.
The truth is, some things do work better when they are socialized and some things do not. There will be a natural movement to some things being socialized but not all will end up going that way but every time there is a step in that direction, like with social medicine, people get scared out of their minds and start talking about nazi's and communism and they think the world is ending
I simply cannot believe all of the tasteless, hateful, uncalled for positings on this topic. maybe a few of you are the true enemies of this country.
Tom i agree, i don't understand how anyone can come on here and take the time to hide behind a computer and say the very things that they would not have the courage to say to a family member at the grave site...whether they want to admit it or not, sacrifices where made by few to protect the very freedom of the ability to speak their hate..
I believe it is honorable to try and prevent even one more death of a young American soldier. I believe it is patriotic in the extreme to try and get every single American soldier OUT of wars, fueled by lies, of commercial conquest. It is appropriate on this thread and in our national discourse to point out that Dick Cheney has publicly stated that we should still be in Iraq and that Willard Romney has embraced Cheney's advice and has been suggesting the possibility of a war with Iran and that neither of these paragons of military service want us to exit Afghanistan. We have a choice coming. We can live in a world of constant fear and the threat of perpetual war, with thousands more American dead and trillions more spent on death in the Middle East. Or we can embrace a new paradigm of war against our enemies. Of drones and covert operations and super soldier Special Forces effectively and economically operating throughout the world.
I don't want one more grave in Arlington or any military cemetery. I don't want one more mother or one more father to grieve the loss of a young son or daughter in any war. I know that this is an impossible wish but I want to get to a place where our country does not burn lives or national treasure in futile wars of conquest or vengeance or political calculation. We have a choice coming. I know how I am going to vote. It will be for Obama.
That is all well and good. However the history of America is war and conquest. Unavoidable subject. We all stand and live on the efforts of our military, like it or not. Unless you have served, your comments are slightly disingenuous.
Bluelake,
There's a lot of I's in your comment of a day that's dedicated to the fallen, and their families. And injecting "your political choice" into the conversation honors the fallen, and their families how?
William, it is about I in the end, you oughta get a clue about our soldiers fighting ill thought wars. The I part is totally lost when you talk about all the fallen soldiers with no respect for those that will fall in the future. You can fix it but not after it happens. Talk to any family who has lost a kid and tell me it isn't about the I part.
My sincerest love, respect and heart felt gratitude goes out to all who have placed the ultimate sacrifice on the altar of freedom for this great country of ours. At this critical time when our constitution, way of life and the very future of this great country is at risk of being lost forever by those in power, let us the American People remember the wives and fathers, the sons and daughters and the brothers and sisters who gave up all their future tomorrows so we can have ours. Thank you to all of our service men and women past, present and future. God Bless America.
the flag has touched the ground
(yeah it hurts me like a mother phucker-too)
I belive thats where the country is today
and the hope of --say it aint so
My girl is an Army flight nurse. Getting her first deployment this year. I cannot think of one family or group of friends that we know that honor this holiday in the least. I guess it is true, if something does not directly effect a person, most could care less.
Thank you all for your selfless service. The sacrifice that you and your families make are so appreciated by us all. Unfortunately, the decisions to go to war are made by our politicians and I'm sad to say that those decisions aren't always the best. The men and women who serve don't question those decisions, they do what they were trained for, they don't get into the politics that brought them to these places. I think our politicians need to really understand the impact that their decisions make on our young men and women who serve and if war is necessary, take care of them when they return. The things that are happening to some of these service people upon return to civilian life is appalling.
Thankfully the number of mothers with dead sons who were killed in action in Afghanistan and Iraq is very tiny compared to the number of moms of vets who died in Vietnam, Korea and especially WW2.
I think combined we're at about 7000 fatalities from both wars. Vietnam was 58,000 and WW2 400,000. Back then we had a much smaller population too, so the deaths were felt even more.
Say a prayer for the fallen, and their families. Honor "their" sacrifices without political rhetoric, or any other self serving comments.
"For those that fought for it.. Freedom has a flavor the protected will never know".. Author Unknown..
God Bless to all those who paid the ultimate price in keeping us free. May their family and friends find comfort in knowing their dedication and love for Country....
Nothing I can say to those who have lost loved ones can express what is in my heart. Many Americans over the years, starting with the Revolutionary War to our current two wars have served honorably for their country. We will never know all their names. We will never know their sacrifice. Most Americans can only imagine what they endured fighting for our country.
Many coming home from these last two wars will bear the scars of those wars, something the remaining living veterans of WWII, Korean, and Vietnam Wars know all too well. While many come home appearing "unscathed", those emotional and psychological scars are never easily seen. The truth is all who serve and their families are forever changed. Those serving with honor deserve our utmost respect and admiration, whether they come back with physical, emotional, or psychological scars.
Like other holidays, the real meaning behind Memorial Day has been skewed to a degree. There are many Americans who do remember what Memorial Day represents while others view it as a day to have fun. That said, brave soldiers have fought for the right of all Americans to observe Memorial Day. While I plan on observing the day honoring those who fought for our country, I also see nothing wrong with those who may have a BBQ or picnic and also plan on having one tomorrow. Memorial Day is a day to honor those who fought for our country but it doesn't mean that is the only thing we should do tomorrow.
My father said once that he respected those honoring his service on Memorial Day. But as we should honor those who have fallen, Memorial Day should also be a day to celebrate their lives while on this earth. Their earthly bodies may be gone, but their everloving spirits live on in all of us. Let us never forget that.
Your father's a very smart man.
Our family lost good people in just about every war since the US Civil War. Our personal view is that... these brave men and women died so that we could enjoy the freedoms they fought for. We feel that we honor our fallen by exercising those rights they died to protect. If we didn't, it would be a waste. So for us, Memorial Day is a day to celebrate our nation and our liberty...
This is to (Mr. Jeff Black, msnbc.com) can you
please tell me why you would put the caption like you did?
I think (Barbecues 'bottom of the list' for
mothers of fallen troops on Memorial Day) is not a very appropriate
caption for this piece, it should have been more fitting to have it captioned in a more respectful for
such as (Parents paying tribute to there of fallen troops on Memorial Day) your uncaring angle is very disappointing. I for one do not care what your political affiliation is as this is not the place for it.
My condolences go out to the family of the fallen.
I sent an e-mail to MSNBC lets see what happens.
'mediainquiries@msnbc.com'
If we flood them they will have to do something.
remember they gave the ultimate sacrifice, their life! it is a holy day for their souls.
They died so we could be free and live in liberty. I cannot think of any more fitting tribute to our fallen heroes but to apply those liberties and enjoy then, in their honor.
Just my personal opinion.
What we need is a internet campaign to substitute the word 'commemorate' instead of the many words used for other 3 day weekends (e.g. instead of happy, celebrate, holiday etc.) This is the time to change! Write or email to the stores and car dealers etc.
My mother cried as I left for Vietnam, but 3 yrs later she was smiling glad I made it home not in a body bag. She worried about the war lasting so long when I was 16 yrs old watching Bob Hope entertain the troops in Vietnam on TV. Lo & behold the time came & the war was still going on. It's a sad day for families who lost a loved one & for buddies who lost several other buddies. All wars stink to no end, they are atrocious. It is not normal to witness war & what it can do to the mind & body. My uncle who fought in Italy against the Germans in WWII was never the same, he came out wounded in the mind with a full disability. He couldn't forget the past of war. He became a loner til the day he died 35 yrs later. The war had finally killed him & many more like him in other wars also. I thought there would never be wars that last 10 years since the end of the draft, I was wrong. Oh how I hate war so bad. Do we go to war to stop war? Is there always going to be war somewhere,somehow? Why?
Thank you for reminding us the true meaning of memorial day. And thanks to all veterans, past, present, and future, with special thanks to those that have lost their lives.
A salute to the fallen and my families condolences to those who have lost a loved one. Memorial day is not a day for barbeques and beer, it's a day to reflect on those who gave their lives so we can live free. To those who served and died, I give you my gratitude and my solemn promise that you will never be forgotten. From the Revolutionary War to the current conflicts, your names will live on, as the heroes you are.
I am always reminded of a line from a poem by the English poet and WW 1 officer Sassoon: "sneak home and pray you'll never know the hell where youth and laughter go...."
I have a nephew in service, 4th generation of my family to serve in time of war, and I pray every night for our military.
I offer my prayer of thanksgiving to those who served and those who who still serve our nation, for those who gave their all. And I pray for their families.
God bless them every one.
My sympathy goes to all family and friends who have lost their loved ones in war. Freedom is not free, but our country is paying way too much in order to keep terrorism from conquering the United States. Meanwhile, in Syria these heartless enemies are killing children right along with innocent adults. These terrorists will be stopped eventually. Although, how many more lives will be lost, how many more of our young American soldiers will let war eat through their minds and how long will we, as American citizens continue to let this go on? Stop ignoring suspicious things going on around you or suspicious individuals meddling through your community. Report everything to the local law enforcement agency, do your part to lessen the challenge our soldiers face everyday.
I'm a disabled combat veteran. Once a year most Americans briefly pause between beer and hot dogs to vaguely remember those who died for you, and the rest of the year do not give a sh*t about those who survived but are mained and fu*ked up. Enjoy your holiday.
"It's Tommy this and Tommy that and chuck him out the brute. But it's savior of his country when the guns begin to shoot"
Kipling
I wish I could say you're wrong, but from where I'm standing, you hit the painful truth spot-on.
It isn't about the best sales.
It isn't about a "holiday" weekend or sleeping late..
It isn't about a day off from work or having the most fun..
It is about a dedicated group of individuals who VOLUNTEER(ed) to put their lives on the line, so that we don't have to. So that we can enjoy the freedoms and way of life that we have come to know.
On this day, I say thank you. To those past and present, who took the oath and signed their names on the dotted line.. Those that gave some and those that gave all.. Thank you, you are appreciated.
I salute all mothers of our Vets. I was fortunate to see the strong love and cares of these Mom's while I was in Vietnam. My Mom died of a disease when I was six years old. My fellow soldiers made sure I experience the love of a Mom. They shared the cookies and letters with me. I got the true meaning of Mom's to their child. I realize nothing hurts worst, than a Mom losing her child during these wars. God Bless you Mom's.
There is nothing that equals what the people that lost their lives for this country have given....as a vet I feel fortunate and humbled by those who gave the ultimate sacrifice......I sometimes wonder if I would have been put in a situation where I had to make a choice of my life or the honor of my country what would have my choice have been.....I will never know the answer to that question...but I do know thwat the people that have made that choice deserve a respect that is beyond words or gratitudes....God bless them and God bless America.